THE BURIAL OF MICKEY MOUSE - Page 20
(Edited extract from
Natalie's Paris diary)
Last night at F's
an extraordinary gathering, a conference of strange birds
emitting strange sounds pertaining to strange matters
important to the bird-world and only distantly related
to the human world. Graphologist, astrologist, morphologist,
investigators of the spirit- world, and the turbanned
clairvoyante F, a great heron towering above the others:
fat bossy mother hen, shy little grey sparrow, confident
canary, scary crow, and me, some kind of bird too, I
suppose, but not part of their tribe. Their bird-eyes
focused on me, encouraged by F who wants to help me emerge
from my foggy state. I couldn't resist giggling inwardly
at being the subject of such concentrated bird-attention
but I was intrigued by some of their commentary.My
face was read and I was pronounced a creature of extremes.
My handwriting, closely examined, elicited insights like:
"Quand vous
vous emballez pour une chose, demandez vous si le contraire ne
serait pas aussi bon." (when
you become enthusiastic about something,
ask yourself if the contrary might not be just as good).
"Regardez plus
haut pour descendre plus en profondeur." (look
higher up in order to go deeper). Regardez
en dedans pour voir en dehors (look
within in order to see outside).
I was
told I possess all the
qualities of the Lion-Sun
("amour ardent")
but am lacking a throne,
stability. I am more
affected by "coups
d'épingles" (pin-pricks)
than by "coups d'épée" (sword-slashes)
and am too concerned
with finding in the exterior
world what I could find
within.
They got
me talking about the
past, about my work,
about Reg - I never had
such an attentive, appreciative
audience. But it was
also uncomfortable. I
wanted to say: enough
already! Enough of all
these ologies. Reality
is something else. Those
bird-people seem to me
to lack something. They
are quick and bright
and perceptive but something's
missing - I think it's
the capacity for transforming
thought into action.
Into work. Their work
is concerned only with
interpretation, with
dreams. They may be able
to fly but can they walk,
or run or dance? Since
their activity is limited
to the super-natural
they don't function so
well in the real world.
I have that tendency
too but I don't want
to go that way!Taking
a more down to earth
approach, one of the
guests, a wealthy businessman
much older than me and
not noticeably psychic,
declared that I was a "cerebrale
sensuelle", just
his type, and invited
me to join him on a trip
to the Riviera. Definitely
flattered but wholly
unattracted to this man
I declined in a bantering
manner, letting him think
that I would have accepted
if only I didn't have
such urgent business
awaiting me in London.
A lie of course. Nothing,
or everything, was urgently
awaiting me anywhere. 